“FLABBY
PERVERTED CHRISTIANS FEED ON THE FLABBY PERVERTED VERSIONS”
That’s
right Dear Reader, the high fibre content of the King James Bible is a
distasteful diet for the spiritually lazy, sloppy and flabby person who
calls
himself a Christian.
“Arrrgh!
Study?” cry the Flabby Ones “we crave the Heinz Baby
Food Versions …
you know … predigested
for our little tummies.” (2Timothy
2:15)
You
know, if it wasn’t so sad, it would be funny.
These
Christian Flabby
Ones, when undergoing a
medical operation, would only want to have the most highly skilled of
surgeons
… those that that did not get their
Doctors credentials from such
publications as “The Idiot’s Guide to Surgery” … and everybody’s favourite …
“Brain Surgery for Dummies”.
Yes
Dear Reader, it is a paradox that the Christian Flabby Ones have jobs
and
careers in the exceedingly exact
dot.com world … where
reputations, fortunes and lives are most at risk.
Yet
their choice of a ‘bible’ leaves one shaking one’s head.
I
was chatting to a Solicitor the other day
… a very sharp legal mind …
who was sitting on the fence about the rapture … as to whether it was
true or
not.
He
said “I don’t know.”
Why
didn’t he know?
I
tell you why … he has the promise of eternal security … “I’m saved, I
go to
church every week and plop my tithes into the plate, and I’ve got my
ESV … that’s
all I need to know. The Pastor will help to connect the dots.”
“Dear
oh dear oh dearie me! … someone get me a headache tablet … please!”
You
see Dear Reader, you would think that a sharp legal mind would believe
the
sharp legal Bible … to wit … the King James Bible … because when you
do, you
can actually study the thing and get a handle on the dispensations,
prophecy
and the things to come … you the basics of knowledge, understanding and
wisdom.
However
having a Presbyterian background … he was ruined from a young child …
not being
taught the truth from the beginning.
Reformed?
From what? He got reformed from the truth? That’s right, he got deformed.
Another
case in point was a Baptist
church elder … a self-confessed
‘christian’ philosopher … you know a chalk and cheese man … you know …
“Sometimes
I like eating chalk and then sometimes I like eating cheese … and quite
frankly
… I can’t tell the difference”.
He’d
gone on one of those 3,000 kilometre walks over seas … looking for
clarity in
life I guess ... why? I ask the question … “You’re are Christian aren’t
you …
what more clarity do you want?”.
He has
a highly specific business in computer fraud and security … but he
slurps up
the scum of an ESV, NLT or NIV.
Christian
philosophy is just another name for
“I’m bamboozled about the Bible … I can’t tell Arthur from Martha.”
They’re
tight as a corkscrew when it comes to their professions in the world …
that
dot.com place where you must be correct … but they’re as “drunk as a
sailor on
a Saturday night” when dealing with the Bible.
Dear
Reader, if you are saved, you are probably covering up your ignorance
about the
written word, by using a flabby
perversion.
You
need to get it straight before you get home to heaven … where you will
slam
headlong into the ‘terror
of the Lord’ (2 Corinthians
5:11).
“That’s
a bit condemnatory and strong” I hear you say.
“Well
you would say that because of the flabby perversion you have.”
I
was attempting to convince an Evangelical
Calvinist Reformed Pastor about the
blasphemy of
his doctrine … an ESV/NLT user … you know a perversion that lets you
slide all
over the road in your car, on a icy wet road on a dark night … before
you crash
into a tree.
I
said to him “Look my good fellow, this is going to cost you down here
or up
there … and if I were you I wouldn’t leave to heaven to get whacked by
the
Lord!”
Having
an impenetrable armour akin to a Navy destroyer with eighteen inch
thick iron
plates, he almost yawned as he shrugged and said nothing.
But
of course, they all follow today’s trend, and that is to have a
computer
perversion on your phone or portable laptop … “Mmmm! The sermon’s
boring so
I’ll pretend to be looking up my ‘bible’ on my phone.”
The
written word? … “Destroying all the trees” a smug Baptist
elder said.
“Oh
look! Flying out the window … It’s a bird!? It’s a plane!? … No! It’s
the fibre
packed, nutrient rich King James Bible!”
“Study is too
hard for me … I’m a spiritually flabby Christian … I
can’t start all over again … I’ve got too much to lose …
position,
reputation and friends …
now leave me
alone and hand me my fibre-less perversion?”
Harley
Hitchcock
June 2026
This
website’s front page is:
www.
“THE
EZI-GUIDE TO SURGERY”
aka
“SURGERY
FOR DUMMIES”
